Paul's Heart

Life As A Dad, And A Survivor

Archive for the category “Bullying”

Hey Frontier Airlines! I Just Want You To Know…

Hey Frontier Airlines! I just want you to know… that you SUCK!

Oh, you do not have to worry about me thinking you care about the inconvenience you caused yesterday. The loss of time with my daughter yesterday and this weekend clearly is not your problem. But here is your problem. “Du bist mies” (German).

Forget the fact, that this was the second flight in a row that you have cancelled for me in a month and a half, after I had already checked in. You clearly knew the flight was going to be cancelled sooner, yet, it was not until my daughter was on her way to the airport, and a notification by Flight Aware, not you, Frontier Airlines, that the flight was cancelled. “Vous etes nuls” (French).

You never offer any explanation as to why the flights have been cancelled. This is quite arrogant of you. It is quite obvious why you do not offer explanations. If it were the weather, you could just say so. No one would ever blame a judgment call because of bad weather. But yesterday’s flight cancellation was not because of weather, though clearly weather did cause a great number of delays. Frontier Airline and Countour Airline (had never even heard of that one before) were the only ones to cancel flights. All other flights took off. It was not the weather. “Pesimo” (Spanish).

On average, your airline only has one flight to a destination per day. Why is it that you cannot even get just that one flight out when other airlines get multiple flights out, even if late? You will not say. “Jestes do bani” (Polish).

Do you remember that one flight that you lost my luggage in spite of your flight being non-stop? I do. There were about 30 of us at that airport, trying to find out what happened to the luggage that was loaded at the departing airport, but did not arrive. Your personnel offered no explanation other than “we are looking into it.” When it turned out, another passenger had a tracker turned on for a device in his checked bag (he must have experienced this before), he discovered that his luggage was indeed back at the departing airport. Why was he able to figure that out, but not your employee? And then, all your employee would offer, was that the luggage would be flown here “as soon as possible,” in spite of a second departing airplane from that same airport an hour later, refusing to guarantee the luggage would be placed on that plane. And why was the luggage bumped from the airplane in the first place? Was it true that “contracted cargo” bumped passenger luggage for space on the airplane? “Bena vagy” (Hungarian).

Even during the Covid-19 crisis, somehow you managed to operate more reliably than now, especially with the extra steps of disinfecting the planes and surveillance upon boarding. The government even gave your airline relief funds to help you survive the pandemic and restrictions by retaining your staff. But did you keep your staff? “Du suger” (Swedish).

The kicker? While you are forced to give refunds for flights that you cancel, it is hysterical that you offer a credit voucher for your “inconveniencing” me. So just because you think I have a low enough IQ, you want me, to schedule more flights with you, in spite of the frequency of cancellations, and you are going to bribe me with a $50 voucher (that cannot be exchanged for cash to say… purchase a ticket for another airline to get to my destination). You want to keep me hooked, for the possibility and the unreliability that the next flight could get cancelled as well? “Unasinya” (Swahili).

I would like to talk to you about a better way to resolve this issue, but there is no one to talk to in customer service. Customers are told to communicate via the Frontier app or on line. How convenient that this allows you to not subject an employ to the true impact of customers and the inconveniences caused by your airline by supplying what I feel are likely automated generated AI responses. At least gauging by the responses I got in return, the responses were computer generated. So there is no chance, any customer is going to be made whole for their inconvenience and losses because there is no one on the other end. “Fai schifo” (Italian).

There is an expression, “you get what you pay for.” And while no one expects a “discount” airline to be perfect, reliability should not be the thing that is discounted or eliminated. Sure, Frontier Airlines is not as bad as other airlines. I would not think that is a bar that your airline would want to strive to be. But you are getting there. “You suck!” (English).

You do not have to worry Frontier Airlines. I am not going any further with this. As an advocate, I have much more important things to fight for. A losing cause is not one of them. I feel your airline clearly does not care about its customers and customer service.

Real Dad

A while back, I wrote about a co-worker, someone I had considered at least on friendly terms, who made an unfortunate comment about my decision to adopt my daughters. Because I was adopting internationally, he felt that I was bringing people here to take jobs away from Americans, as opposed to the US sending job overseas.

It is not unusual for people to make ignorant and bigoted comments. Especially when it comes to the world of adoption. Some of the comments can be quite insensitive. But nothing could have lit my fuse more, than a comment made over this past weekend, not to me personally, but came across my news feed.

Because I want this post to be directed as intended, and not something political or any other cause, I am not going to name the person who said it, not even gender. But after reading my post, a simple “google” will tell you who said it. Said what you ask?

“Children are in the greatest danger in America today, because traditional family values are being destroyed, the idea that Mom and Dad together, not fake Mom and fake Dad, but biological Mom and biological Dad, can raise their children together, to do what’s right for their children raising them to be confident in who they are, their identity. Their identity, they’re a child made by God.”

Again, a simple “google” and you can find out who spit out this garbage on their podcast, last Thursday, July 14th on Rumble, and you will find a person who has made racist and bigoted comments in the past. So it is no surprise that this person would have no issue making an ignorant and pompous comment as to imply anyone other than a biological parent, is “fake.”

Now, as some may figure out who this is, may want to run to this person’s defense with “they did not mean that you were a fake Dad. You are taking them out of context.” Am I though? This person clearly said, on the video with their own tongue and voice, available on Twitter, “Mom and Dad together, not fake Mom and fake Dad, but biological Mom and biological Dad,” is quite clear.

If this person wanted to be specific, as I said, being a racist and bigot, they know how to single out a specific type of “fake” parent if they wanted, such as “gay parents” or family’s with trans family members. But they did not, because in the past, this person has had their ass handed to them for the other stupid comments made in the past about race and the LGBTQ community.

No, this person was quite clear, if you did not birth the child, you are a fake parent. If the child does not have your genes, you are a fake parent. So, let’s take a look at the types of “fake” parents this person could be referring to as not having “traditional family values.”

  • step parents
  • single parents
  • gay couples
  • trans families
  • adoptive families

I am going to stop there, because I need to make sure I stay in my lane, in other words, speak only of which I know. Though I have had both a stepmother and a stepfather, I do not credit either with who I am today, so I am not going to refer to them either. I will let everyone else advocate for the groups they support.

But, for me, I am an adoptive parent. I am not “fake” as this person put it. I am a real Dad. And from the moment they were placed in my arms, I have done all that I can, to make sure that they learned my values, which I know are different from this person. After all, who is this person to decide that their values are better than mine? Neither of my daughters have gotten into any trouble, legally or morally. They seem to have done well with the values I have taught them. I have taught them how important it is to be proud of who they are and where they are from, and to learn and respect all of our American history as well as their Asian culture, for that is the only way not to repeat the ugly parts of it. They are law abiding, respectful, polite, and loving. And if you asked either of my daughters, I am definitely their real Dad. And they are definitely confident in who they are.

No, they were not born of my blood. But they were born in my heart. And from the moment they were placed in my arms, I became their real Dad.

I am sure the adoption community will have a field day if they share the outrage and disgust I am experiencing from yet another worthless and pompous self-righteous judgement from someone who really needs to look at themselves before judging others. In fact, it has been a while since I have opened it, but if this person believed in what they spoke, which is clearly written in the Bible I was raised on, Matthew 7:1, Jesus warns that those who condemn others will themselves be condemned (also loosely translated, “judge not, lest ye be judged”. Someone needs to practice what they preach.

Not Playing Favorites

When it comes to taking photos with my daughters, nearly all of the time, you will see one on each side of me. Much like a scale, to me, this particular pose, shows balance, equal. And that is the relationship that I want with my daughters. I do not favor one over the other.

Adopted roughly two years apart, that is the only advantage that one daughter has over the other, time. I pretty much nipped any kind of “competition” or sibling rivalry in the bud at the first sign when my older daughter asked following a karate demonstration, “who did it better?” referring to her sister’s execution versus hers.

Up until their high school years, I gave them constant reminders, anytime I heard any hint of one having an edge over the other in anything particular. That it was okay if something came easier for one than the other. That each would have their own methods to get from point A to point B, and both could be correct. But that did not mean that one way was better than the other.

In the theory of nature versus nurture, both daughters were raised to have the same values and virtues. That I expect of both of them. In that regard, they are both equal, and I could not be more proud.

But as they grew, they each developed their own interests and likes. They each got stronger in certain skills. Both have their own study habits. Both of my daughters have their own paths to get from point A to point B, and both, will get there.

As I mentioned, time is the only difference between the love I have shared equally with them. I have a year and a half more photos and memories. But that is all.

Now, as my daughters reach adulthood, there is a shift. I will have one daughter going off to college. And just like the song “Cats In The Cradle,” I expect difficulty in time to get to spend with her. And while my younger daughter graduates the following year, I will continue the frequency in visits with her, until she moves on as well. But time, is the only advantage one has over the other. That is not me favoring one over the other.

In their elementary and middle school years, it was a lot easier to maintain this balance. But in high school, as future goals and decisions needed to be made, I do my best to maintain that balance, making sure not to ignore one daughter over the other. Both of them have important things going on in their lives, again, just the timing of one year between them making the difference. They both need my attention. I love each of them the same.

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