Paul's Heart

Life As A Dad, And A Survivor

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If You Are Sick… It Sucks To Be You.


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The headline in the New York Times for July 8, 2014 read:

“Rapid Price Increases for Some Generic Drugs Catch Users by Surprise”

The picture as shown above from that same article showed a patient meeting with her doctor.  She needs a drug called “Digoxin” for her heart.  It is the only pill that works for her.  And she is not alone.  There are hundreds of millions of people who need medicine to maintain their quality of life.  With Big Pharm taking full advantage of drugs they produce still on patent, basically charging whatever they want, without insurance, you simply cannot afford to be healthy anymore.

Generic drug availability was supposed to take care of that.  Obviously, with companies taking advantage of expired patents, drastically cheaper and affordable alternatives would finally offer patients a difference between affording life or choosing death.  But as new drugs come out to the market, once again on patent, two things happen.  Television commercials begin to appear telling patients the best new drug to do better than what a patient was already taking is available and needs to be discussed with their doctor.  This is followed by a lowered demand for the generic drug that many people rely on.  Then of course you factor in the costs to pharmacies, with surely the small “mom and pop” pharmacies not able to compete at all with the super chain pharmacies.  Even with insurance, you may no longer be able to take the drugs that have worked for you, simply because it is not convenient for Big Pharm.

Even though I am lucky to have insurance that includes prescriptions, my insurance still tries to dictate to me whether I will take the generic or the original name brand drug.  As a rule, I have always taken the name brand because a) I have always believed the name brand to be better than the generic, and b) I had the insurance to cover the cost.  Over the years however, my prescription plan tiered to make name brand more expensive to me, so of course eventually I adjusted to taking the cheaper generic drugs.

But as pointed out by potential presidential hopeful Bernie Sanders, Independent Senator from the state of Vermont, generic prices are soaring out of control.  If it is not health care costs going out of control for profit at the expense of a human life, health insurance also contributed to this skyrocketing cost, but as more patients turned away from the expensive alternatives to save and maintain their lives to cheaper costing generic drugs, Big Pharm did the only thing it could to solve its need for greed… jacking up generic costs.

This is disgusting for a couple of reasons.  Generics finally offered an alternative for people to take care of their health who otherwise could not.   But for those who are fortunate enough to have insurance that includes prescriptions, now those insurance companies are beginning to dictate what drugs they will cover, even though they are generic.  And the reaction, as should be expected, the less a drug is being prescribed, the more the price will go up as well, even if it is generic.  And that is what is happening.

Okay, so I addressed the issue skyrocketing generic drug prices.  People without any insurance covering generic prescriptions will no longer be able to afford medicines.  Those with insurance that provides coverage should be okay for now.  But what about the people in the middle?  What about those on Medicare and fixed income?  For a family I know, this has become a real issue.  They are covered under Medicare and also have AARP insurance.  But because of the level of retirement income received, their prescription coverage has maxed out, and we are only in the middle of October.  This means that the elderly couple cannot afford their medicines for the next two and a half months, medicines they need to keep them alive.  While some may argue that if they income level is too high for the benefits, then that is the couple’s problem.  No, it is not.  With the cost of living going up every year, rent, fuel, gas, food, GENERIC PRESCRIPTION DRUGS, but their fixed income remains the same, year after year, where exactly is their income level too high?  Their income stays the same while all of their expenses continue to rise.

I wish I had an answer to this dilemma, which is why I turn to you, the readers of “Paul’s Heart.”   I know this family is not the only one going through this issue.  But I am at a loss for anymore solutions to offer them, as I have tried even using common sense to help solve their needs, and nothing has helped.

So the question is this…

“For those who must deal with this “donut hole” for prescription medicine, how do you afford your medicine, or are you simply rolling the dice until the next year comes around?”

I need your help.  This family needs your help.  They are elderly, with one spouse dealing with both cancer and dementia combined, and at least for the next two and a half months cannot afford the medicine needed to deal with these two major health ailments, along with the other medicines taken.  Comments shared on this blog are kept confidential unless you specify otherwise.  And keep this in mind, your replies will not only help this family, but many others who read “Paul’s Heart.”

I Miss My Dad


I am sitting at my laptop, as I do often every night.  As I do, I am always listening to music.  A “supergroup” called Mike & The Mechanics featuring Paul Karrack and Mike Rutherford of Genesis recorded an awesome song which addressed a son’s unresolved issues before the loss of his father.  I am fortunate that I was able to have closure  with so many things with my father before he passed.  But the song reminded me of what could have happened had my dad and I not taken the opportunity.

Here are the lyrics to “The Living Years” recorded by Mike & The Mechanics.  Dad, I miss you.

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“The Living Years”
Every generation
Blames the one before
And all of their frustrations
Come beating on your door

I know that I’m a prisoner
To all my Father held so dear
I know that I’m a hostage
To all his hopes and fears
I just wish I could have told him in the living years

Crumpled bits of paper
Filled with imperfect thought
Stilted conversations
I’m afraid that’s all we’ve got

You say you just don’t see it
He says it’s perfect sense
You just can’t get agreement
In this present tense
We all talk a different language
Talking in defense

Say it loud, say it clear
You can listen as well as you hear
It’s too late when we die
To admit we don’t see eye to eye

So we open up a quarrel
Between the present and the past
We only sacrifice the future
It’s the bitterness that lasts

So don’t yield to the fortunes
You sometimes see as fate
It may have a new perspective
On a different date
And if you don’t give up, and don’t give in
You may just be O.K.

Say it loud, say it clear
You can listen as well as you hear
It’s too late when we die
To admit we don’t see eye to eye

I wasn’t there that morning
When my Father passed away
I didn’t get to tell him
All the things I had to say

I think I caught his spirit
Later that same year
I’m sure I heard his echo
In my baby’s new born tears
I just wish I could have told him in the living years

Say it loud, say it clear
You can listen as well as you hear
It’s too late when we die
To admit we don’t see eye to eye

Post #300


I am never going to produce a major blockbuster movie like “300”. Nor will I ever have an opportunity to hit 300 homeruns. In fact the closest I have ever come to achieving 300 of anything would have been a perfect game in bowling back in my late 20’s. I threw strikes in the first nine frames, and then tapped a ten-pin, spared it, then completed the game with another strike in the 11th frame.

With my blog, I am finally achieving a 300, my 300th post on “Paul’s Heart.” My posts are at over 8000 views and the comments of support and appreciation are numerous. This is a big deal for me, but pales in comparison into the week ahead that I am going to have.

Next weekend, Father’s Day weekend, I will be memorializing my father who passed away three weeks ago. After discussing it with my siblings, we felt it was an appropriate tribute to our father. Just as many who have gone through such a personal loss, I am sure that you can understand the struggle to deal with “the first Father’s Day without my father.”

At the same time, it is Father’s Day weekend, something that I have always looked forward to since before I adopted my daughters. Besides the emotional toll of my father’s memorial to deal with, this will be the first Father’s Day for me with just my daughters. Due to the recent custody agreement I made with their mother, and my father’s passing, I have not been able to see them in a long time, the longest time apart.

I speak to my daughters every day, and on a couple of occasions I have been able to see my daughters courtesy of Facetime. I will get to spend the entire weekend with them, and I have a lot of activities planned with them. But next weekend will not be just about me. Every day I have thought about the hurt and confusion that my daughters must have. Which is why I will pull out all the stops to show them next weekend that the divorce does not change who their mother is, or who their father is. It is important to me to make sure that my children do not blame themselves for the divorce, that the divorce was an issue between just their mother and I.

The girls get to do a lot of fun things with their mother, and next weekend, I cannot wait to spend time with them.

My story is not unique, as there are probably thousands of other dads who have a similar story heading into next weekend. My parents divorced when I was young. So I have the perspective from both child and parent.

Next weekend is not about quantity, but rather the quality of the time that I get with my daughters.

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