Paul's Heart

Life As A Dad, And A Survivor

26 Apr 2013

Pollo – A Lesson Learned From Man’s Best Friend


Pollo is the greatest dog in the world as far as dogs go.  As far as humans go, he is one of the greatest friends to have.

His life began in a puppy mill outside of Lancaster, but out of our ignorance about origins of most pet shop dogs, he ended up in our family.  We could have worked him like many other golden retrievers, but instead, let him do what he did best, be a dog.  We have a huge fenced in yard, so he can just patrol or run full tilt if he would like.  He also has gotten to enjoy our inground pool whether jumping in from the side or off from the diving board.  In recent years, he has enjoyed better than the kibble I have strictly served him courtesy of youg children.

Pollo is now 13, which in people years is 97 years old.  But guess what.  He still has that puppy-excitement in him.  That is all we have ever seen from him.  The groomer often refers to him as “the Happy Golden.”  We have taken him to the vet every year for his annual exams and shots.

Our works schedules were not the best for someone who has been so faithful and loyal a companion as Pollo.  Having only a couple of felines keeping him company, he seemed content just napping all day, and occasionally rooting through an occasional bath towel.  But the moment we came home, right by our side.

It is hard for Pollo these days.  Over the years, he has developed “fatty tumors” which our vet has told us, for a dog his age, not really an issue at this point, as long as they do not cause him any discomfort.  There are several now, and some quite large.  But Pollo shows no signs of discomfort.  I am trained in animal care, so I know what to look for, head tilt, eating and bathroom habits, lethargy, and so on.  He is still the puppy from thirteen years ago.

His decision to enjoy a mushroom buffet in our backyard was not one of his shining moments of intelligence last year, but following that incident, his age is beginning to show very quickly, and not just from the whitening of his muzzle.

Though is favorite spot to get comfortable is on our hardwood floors, it is nearly impossible for him to stand if on that surface.  And he now struggles to get up the stairs to our bedroom, “ours” meaning Wendy, myself, and Pollo – where he has been his whole life. 

Pollo has always shadowed Wendy and I.  While he spends a great deal of time sleeping, he wants the company.  No matter which room of the house we are in, he is there.  If I am sitting on a particular chair in one of the rooms that he is already in, even in his sleep, somehow he moves towards me, that within minutes, he is laying on top of my feet.  There is nothing like fur slippers during July.  Upstairs, downstairs, inside, outside, he is with us all the time.  He does not necessarily have separation anxiety, it is just that when he knows we are at home, he wants to be with us.

For some time now, he has been approaching our stairwell with great reservation.  He will climb with his front paws resting on the first step, and just stare at the mountainous climb before him.  I imagine he takes in a deep breath and then begins his laborous ascent, one step at a time.  When he arrives at the top, he proceeds right to his open cage in our bedroom, and plops right down inside it.  I have not closed the door in years as he has never been a dog to jump up on the bed, even if he wanted to, between gravity and his size, he would have as much success as Louie Anderson doing a double front summersault of a 10 meter platform.  But at some point, he ventures from his metal cave/den, and then lays down by my side of the bed which is where he is when I wake up.  He waits until I am completely ready for work, and have fed the guinea pig, and then he follows me downstairs and we complete the rest of our morning routine with each other.

But a few days ago, the task of going up steps is clearly becoming too much of a burden.  Still no whimper or obvious sign of pain or distress, he is intent on staying with us during the overnight.  For the last two nights, I have blocked off our den (leading into our kitchen), and both times he has bulled his way through the chairs (clearly not being able to hurdle them), and each of the last two mornings, there he has been, right by my side.  Even as I heard his paws on the hardwood floors last night as we turned in for the night, and went downstairs to interfere with his plans to get up the stairs, returned him back to the den, at some point, he made his way through the blockade again.

I could not ask for a better dog, or committed and loyal friend.

Posted in Animals, Family and Friends | Leave a comment
22 Apr 2013
1 Comment

When The Kids Have More Fun


I am not sure how many parents still do this, but I remember a comedy bit by Bill Cosby where he told the story of his mother wishing on him, all the things he had done to frustrate his mother as a parent.  You know, “wait until you have kids…”

And I am waiting for that moment.  Which is not to be confused with being anxious for it.  Both of my daughters are already fairly skilled at the “defending against Daddy” approach.  Both girls have a quick wit which they use automatically to disarm me or reduce the amount of scolding they get.  Of course, neither daughter believes of any dire consequences for their actions because Wendy and I have always believed in talking with the kids.  Sure, they have gotten tme out, or lost a favorite toy, but neither has ever given us any reason to consider any other extreme level of punishment.

Both Wendy and I experienced different levels of punishment.  I will throw her “under the bus” as I clearly did not get into the degree of trouble that she got into.  She loves to tell the stories of how she got punished for what her mother “didn’t see you do later.”

Madison is quite good with the loss of “currency” as a form of punishment.  The trick is to hold out, but versus Madison, that is a monumental task because she has endless will.  “Go ahead, take everything from me, even my mattress.”  Fortunately this battle of wills does not come up often.

We are entering an age now with Madison for sure, where we will undoubtedly have to consider “grounding.”  I have a feeling that this will be effective as her friends mean the world to her.  She is a social butterfly.  I foresee only one possible issue coming up, and that was made obvious Saturday evening.

It was a rare Saturday night, that all of us were going in separate directions.  I had school board campaign things to get done.  Wendy had a “girl’s night” event to get to.  And then there was a family function that Wendy took the girls too, but as the girls do not get to see their cousins all that often, she felt it would be okay to ask my mother-in-law to bring them home, which was no problem.

As the night progressed, I finished up around 7:00pm, came home to an empty house.  Okay, I figure everything was fine.  Wendy got home around 9:15pm, empty handed.  She asked me, “they’re not home yet?” to which I responded, “you didn’t pick them up?”  We figured they were having a real good time, and their grandparents were clearly enjoying their conversations.  But then 10:00 came, 11:00 came.  It was 11:30 when the door opened and here they came jabbering away about all the fun that they had.

I went outside to thank Wendy’s parents for keeping them as we knew they would have much more fun at the party with their cousins than having us make them go to bed on a weekend by 9:00pm.  I wonder if I have blown the opportunity to set a curfew before this as I am certain at some point the conversation will come up, “but Dad, there was the time that we were out with MomMom and PopPop past 11:30pm…”

Posted in Family and Friends, Recreation
21 Apr 2013

SongPop


I love music.  I cannot put it any more simpler than that.  I am a third generation musician (vocalist for the most part) and have appeared to transfer that trait onto both of my adopted daughters.  When it comes to music trivia, I am the one most often in the family or circle of friends that people call for either hints or answers.  Buy my love of music goes well beyond that of nerddom.

I began singing around seven years of age, after hearing a recording of my grandfather singing the Battle Hymn of The Republic.  My grandfather was a popular man in our small town, and very well liked.  I heard stories of how much my grandfather meant to me from birth until he passed when I was not yet one year of age.

Over the next several decades, my voice would go in many different directions from choral groups to church choirs to karoake bars.  Of course there is always the car and the shower.

But as happy as music made me, it became a lifeline itself for me.  When I went through my chemo therapy, I created a soundtrack of music that would pump me up to fight my cancer from diagnosis to each particle of medicine versus each cancer cell.  On long road trips, the time goes by much quicker with an Ipod set to “shuffle.”   When I relax around the house, I usually just listen to any of the many music channels on the television cable.  And when I am at work, my ear buds help me to drown out the work-place gossip or hear the constant griping.  Yes, I try to make it as peaceful between my ears as I can.

So one night, in our tech lounge at home, also known as our family room (all four of us using either a laptop, Nook, or Kindle), Wendy calls me over to her laptop and says, “you have to try this.  Play it once and you’ll be hooked.”

In three weeks, I have gone from 50 games, to 113 games, to 227 games clearing a winning record of 23-2 versus opponents.  My one loss against an opponent who has been playing the game for a long time, and appears to have the same amount of experience in music as I do.  The other opponent to beat me evidently figured out a strategy.  At the end of the round, you get to pick the next category from four choices.  Though I listen to most genres of music, there are two that I am weak at, and my niece has figured it out.

It is an exciting game, and for as much as I love listening to music, and relaxing with it, I only get to hear one or two seconds of most of the songs as I compete.  Now to get back to my game.

Posted in Cancer, Family and Friends, Recreation | Leave a comment

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