Paul's Heart

Life As A Dad, And A Survivor

Archive for the category “Recreation”

18 Jan 2023
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Instead Of Resolutions


Before Mr. Big died of a heart attack while riding a Pelaton (a fictional situation for a very popular women’s television show, shocking viewers all over, and the reaction shocking Pelaton), there was another exercise machine that could have been a killer in real life for me. Yes, it was one of the two pictured above. I have used both in the past, and now, only one of those machines unless I am ordered to use the other.

Like many, the new year annually brought me to want to make a resolution to get/stay in shape. Crazy thing called life constantly interrupted that resolution, and it would be forgotten. In 2008, I made a promise to myself that “this is the year I am going to stick to it.” I had even bought a full year membership at the local gym. Surely I would not waste the money letting my membership sit idle.

And soon after the new year, I began my annual quest, the same as every year before it, gradually working my way up in repetitions, sets, and time. I really gave no thought to how I felt physically as I began each workout. But by the beginning of April, that’s right, I was now a full month longer than my exercise plan had lasted in previous years, I began to notice something nagging my body, a reminder that the last time something occurred during my workouts, I was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. But this time, felt different, and it actually hurt.

I preferred the eliptical machine as it felt more of a workout than just going at it on a treadmill. I seemed to burn a lot more calories, and my endurance seemed to hold up pretty well. There was only one problem. As I grabbed the sensor paddles on the handles, and began to “step”, my heart rate registered on the screen. 80. 110. 135. 150. In less than 45 seconds, my heart rate had peaked at 152. I was out of breath, and had an extreme tightness in the left side of my chest. But as it was just tightness, and not pain, unimaginable pain (according to my later father who actually suffered an extreme heart attack), I was not panicking. I was just annoyed.

I slowed my pace down for a few seconds, my heartrate began to come down, and that tightness dissipated. And so I picked my pace back up, since I was comfortable again. Again, my heartrate also climbed back up above 150, where it remained for the remainder of my hour long routine. After that, it was over to the weights side of the gym for the strengthening.

Within two weeks, I would make a call to my family doctor, complaining about this daily situation with the chest tightness coming and going. Within 36 hours of that call, I was on a table having emergency bypass surgery. You can read the whole behind the scenes of that process, from beginning to end, on the page titled “CaBbaGE – Not Just A Green Leafy Vegetable.” But for this post, all you need to know is this. I had a 90% blockage of the main artery going to my heart. It had nothing to do with my age, or my diet (though many would like to say that did not help the situation). The treatments for my Hodgkin’s had progressively destroyed my body over the years, undetected, until I made that phone call. According to my cardiologist, and I quote, “it was not a question if you would die, but when.”

So, spoiler alert, I survived the surgery. The hardest part about the recovery, was that I expected my physical conditioning prior to the surgery, to have been a benefit in my recovery. Instead, in just a week since the surgery, no, less than two days in the hospital after the surgery, lying in the intensive care unit, I had lost all of my conditioning. But as time went on, and I would get cleared to begin cardiac therapy, and eventually physical therapy, I wanted to focus on getting back into shape.

Yep, that meant I went back to my annual resolutions, with the usual results. But now the interruptions were not just because of failure of commitment, but additional health issues that kept breaking up my routine. Plus, I really was not feeling well even as the years went on. There was still more damage to my heart that needed to be repaired.

My third and final heart surgery (final meaning for the time being as all the surgeries are likely going to need to be done again), an aortic valve replacement, occurred a little over a year ago. This surgery was completely different, as it was not invasive or as destructive as my original bypass surgery. The whole process of this surgery allowed for a quicker recovery as well. Of course, I went through cardiac rehab again, and as soon as I was cleared, I went back to strengthening.

If there was one thing that I credit to my survival of that original bypass surgery, was my conditioning at the time. I would not discover until years later, the risks, and the protocols that came with the surgery on a Hodgkin’s Lymphoma survivor. But I believe my body was able to handle the trauma of that surgery, giving me the chance to recover, and regain my fitness. And following this last surgery, having not lost any of my strength or stamina, I was ready to move forward. I know I needed to be smart about this. My heart has been operated on three times, and each time, becomes more of a risk.

January of 2021 was the perfect time for me to be cleared to exercise. No one can ever make an accusation of me ever becoming a bodybuilding champion, but I really wanted to be in a good condition. I know that there will come a time, when I need to have any or all of these surgeries again. If I am to have any chance of survival this time around, my body needs to be in the best condition I have ever had it in.

But unlike the other years, years in which my exercise regimens were driven under the guise of a “resolution,” I made this a lifestyle commitment. There has been only one obstacle to this commitment, Covid. Because we are at a point in this pandemic, people have their own ways of living with the pandemic, some with concern for others, some without, I knew that there were times that someone infected with Covid, chose to ignore the safety of others, using the gym. So, on multiple occasions I had to make the choice, to avoid the gym for a couple of weeks, assuming that these individuals were also of the mindset to not wipe down the equipment either. As I begin my second January of this continued routine, I do feel that my body is in a decent enough condition, should I face another major health challenge.

I would say that I have done all that I can. But those around me would argue that I should do the same with my diet, make that more healthy, which I have not been able to reconcile as being a benefit enough to make the commitment. Basically to do it now, would be nothing more than making a resolution. And I do not have decent track record with resolutions.

And while during cardiac rehab did “force” me to get back on the eliptical machine, the panic attacks, I was able to keep under control. But on my own, I do not have the intestinal fortitude to use that machine again, unsupervised. I won’t let that be my “Pelaton.”

Posted in Cancer, Education, Family and Friends, Inspired By..., Recreation, Side Effects, The Heart
07 Jan 2023

Did He Really Ask That?


The news this morning for anyone following the health situation of Buffalo Bills safety Damar Hamlin, who collapsed on the field following a tackle, suffering cardiac arrest, having to be actually revived on the field, is GREAT! After being treated in the intensive care unit, sedated while in critical condition, this 24 year-old “kid”, is awake, and communicating. In fact, as of yesterday, he spoke with his teammates via Facetime, after the breathing tube had been removed, a truly astonishing moment, something both fans of sports and non-fans had been hoping to see for this young man.

Two days ago however, while Hamlin was still intubated (connected to a breathing machine), Hamlin was still able to communicate, via writing, and it is what he “asked” that left some scratching their heads as to his priorities, others thinking “that’s who he is,” and others wondering if there was anything wrong. You see, the last thing Hamlin remembers is playing a football game. No one has mentioned if he remembers the play that almost killed him. But he does remember he was playing a game. Though I am sure it is gently being explained to him, where he is, and why, I am certain, there was a lot of mass confusion for him when his eyes opened.

“Did we win the game?” That is reportedly one of the first things Hamlin was able to communicate with assistance. While all of us watching, are worried if he would even recover, Hamlin was worried about the game result. But again, there are factors here to understand. Sure, the game mattered to Hamlin, and he likely had no idea how serious the situation was. But his brain has likely not processed everything either as to what has happened.

The truth is, we have likely seen a situation ourselves like this before, though hopefully not as severe.

Both of my daughters required tubes placed in their ears as infants/toddlers for relief of chronic ear infections. My older daughter woke up with no issues from the anesthesia. But my younger daughter came to with a confusion that left her confused and hysterical, not waking up where she last knew she was (the recovery room as opposed to the hospital bay where she fell asleep). Her reaction could not have been any more terrifying to her.

I have my own experience as well, and a bit more detailed. In general, I handle anesthesia fairly well. But when I had my emergency double bypass for my LAD blockage, caused by the damage from my Hodgkin’s Lymphoma treatments decades earlier, that was a different story, and somewhat similar to Hamlin’s situation.

I was just coming out of anesthesia that was for a simpler procedure, a catheterization, that was just going to place some stents where the blockage was. The surgeon was explaining it could not be done after all, that instead, I was set up for emergency bypass the next morning at 6:30am. Though my head was foggy, I remember most of the conversation. In fact, I remember much of the activity the rest of the evening as all kinds of tests were being done on me to prepare for the early morning surgery. I remember the large, burly orderly sent to “clean me up,” and take me downstairs. He was the size of Michael Clark Duncan in The Green Mile, definitely not getting any struggle from me.

My last memory of that morning, was laying on a table, completely naked with a blanket covering me. My arms were being secured in a position to allow the surgeon to perform the bypass. I saw so many people walking around, preparing all kinds of materials and equipment I assumed was for me. Then the last thing I remember, and it was a comment made, “he’s so young, too young for this,” referring to me being 42 years of age at the time, but nearly 20 years after my treatments. And then I was out.

I awoke temporarily, evidently panicking, unaware of what all had been done to me, which I recall barely, and was put back out again. The medical staff could not risk anything with my newly repaired heart. After a time, I came to again, this time, a nurse was standing in front of me. I could not see around her. I also could not move. I could not talk. But I could hear her.

“My name is Jackie. I am your nurse. You are doing great Mr. Edelman. I want you to remain calm, and I will tell you everything you need to know. Your surgery is over. Everything went well. You have a tube down your throat which is helping you breath, so you are not able to talk. That tube will come out sometime soon. You will hear a lot of machines, they are all monitoring you. For now, you can communicate with me by blinking your eyes, once for “yes” and twice for “no” as I will only ask you “yes or no” questions. Do you understand me?

I blinked one time. I made it. I survived the surgery. I have no idea what happened, as nothing was explained to me prior. Actually there was no time. I nodded back off to sleep. Obviously, I had been given more pain medication, as it is likely my heartrate was getting to high again.

When I woke again, Jackie had been standing by my bed, performing her care tasks for me. I reached her with my right hand, giving a slight tug on her nursing uniform. She smiled and told me again, everything was okay. I was doing great, as expected. This time, however, I was able to motion, back and forth with that same right hand, finger pointing, as if something was of concern to me. Very much reminiscent of Hamlin. Like him, I had something on my mind prior to my cardiac event.

If you go back to my story “CABG, Not Just A Green Leafy Vegetable,” I had a “priority” of a wedding I was to DJ for. I never had the chance to notify the bride what was going on, and that she would need to find another DJ, just days before her wedding.

CABbaGe – Not Just A Green Leafy Vegetable

I began to make a motion with my right pointer finger, it should be noted I am left handed. I started drawing on my bed with that finger, Jackie realizing I was trying to communicate with her. She soon realized I was trying to write numbers. And then, she recognized I was giving her a phone number. My “then” wife, was nowhere to be found, at least by my bedside, Jackie wrote down the numbers she believes I wrote, and asked “is this a phone number?” I blinked “yes.” “Would you like me to call the number?” Again, I blinked “yes.”

And so, Jackie dialed the number into her phone. Someone on the other end of the line answered. Jackie asked the other person on the end, “do you know a ‘Paul Edelman’?” The person clearly answered as I could see the shock on Jackie’s face, and then she repeated what was said to her, “he is your DJ for your wedding this Saturday? (just two days away)”. I gave the “ok” sign with my hand to tell her it was okay for her to tell the person on the phone, I was not sure if it was the bride or the groom she was talking to, what had happened to me.

As Jackie was doing this, I tugged again at her, and again began to “draw” with my pointer finger. Jackie asked the other person to hold as she tried to interpret what I was writing. I actually wrote another phone number, this one for a competitor DJ who I felt might be able to bail me/us out. Jackie asked if I wanted them to call the number, and I blinked “yes.”

Once the tube had been removed, and I had been moved out of the ICU, I reached out to the newlyweds, apologized profusely for the inconvenience, which they were totally understanding about. They were shocked I had the wherewithall, to reach out to them, evening having the phone number of a competitor in my memory, given what I was going through.

So for me, it came as no surprise, that the first thing that Damar Hamlin was concerned about, and when able to convey, was “did we win the game?” This was definitely a huge sign that he was hopefully on the road to a full recovery. Though there are no details about what he actually remembers, from the tackle, to the collapse on the field, to finally coming to in the ICU, he clearly is able to recall what he was doing, playing a football game. And depending on what had been explained to him since his awakening, he is focused on getting back onto the field. Which for the fans, his teammates, the teammates of the team he was playing against, and the NFL, the game was the furthest thing from everyone’s mind, except for Hamlin.

We do not know yet, what Hamlin’s recovery will be, nor, any lingering effects from the event. As a cardiac patient and survivor myself, the days ahead are crucial to be careful, and to pay attention to every detail. Some are beginning to ask if he can ever play again, much like Chris Pronger of the NHL continued to play for years after he took a puck in the chest, dropping him, much like the way Hamlin went down. Who knows Hamlin’s future? But what we do know, that the preparations by the team medical staff made a life and death difference that day, resuscitating Hamlin on the field. His chances of survival and recovery are so much more better because of the Bill’s trainer.

Many of us have been on the other ending when it comes to the failure of the heart, especially with someone so young. And we wish there definitely could have been a different ending, and would do anything to bring back that loved one. That pain we feel is all the more reason, we need to find comfort and joy, that Hamlin’s story appears to be going in the right direction. 42 years was “too young” for what I went through? 24 year-old Hamlin was too young for a cardiac event like this. But it happened.

Posted in Education, Family and Friends, Inspired By..., Recreation, The Heart and tagged , | Leave a comment
03 Jan 2023

It’s About The Human, Not The Game


This morning, many of us, are getting an unexpected anatomy lesson of the heart. Though the catalyst occurred as an injury during a professional football game, the discussion around most breakfast tables and office water coolers is much more consuming.

Last night, the Cincinnati Bengals hosted the Buffalo Bills, in what was considered an unofficial “playoff game” with the end results affecting playoff positions for each team. In what looked like a normal tackle that football fans had seen thousands of times before, would soon become an event that no one would ever forget. Upon completing the textbook tackle, Bills Safety Damar Hamlin got up, as if to prepare for the next play, and suddenly fell backwards, unconscious. Hamlin is just twenty-four years old. And I use the verb tense “is”, because although reports claimed he went into cardiac arrest following that tackle, and needed CPR, and was revived on the field of play, he is currently being treated, in critical care. Everyone is concerned for this young man, and hopefully his full recovery.

Young man. Heart issue. Where have I heard these two phrases together before? Oh, that’s right, as I laid on an operating table at the age of 42, preparing for emergency bypass surgery for a fatal condition I was unaware I had, caused by treatments for my Hodgkin’s Lymphoma eighteen years prior. Since 2008, I have had two more additional heart surgeries, and will likely undergo more in the future. My purpose for stating this is not to say I am an expert, as I am not, is not to compare the situations, as they are not similar, but to say, I understand what is being explained as to what happened to this young football player.

Again, the play itself looked fairly routine, even if a bit more high energy, because it looked like a big play was being stopped. But as powerful as the heart is, its activities are often silent, or unknown to us. We go through our daily activities without giving the beat of our heart a second thought. It is something that just happens. But as myself, and plenty of other long term survivors of Hodgkin’s Lymphoma will tell you, there is so much more to the beat of a heart, and the various conditions that can exist. Unlike the normal and healthy human being, and perhaps the unknowing human, we are more aware of our heart’s condition.

I am not going to get too technical, as even I will get lost. But the heart has a basic rhythm as pictured above. There are five components, called waves, labelled P, Q, R, S, T. I honestly do not understand the mechanics, but I do know, that if there is an abnormality on your EKG, you will get attention. I do know that in my case, and ALWAYS gets a lot of attention from doctors unaware of my condition, that I have what is called an “inverted T” wave. As you can see from the picture below, compared to the one above, this is not a normal condition.

This “inverted T” wave can be a serious issue, as it is often a sign of what is called “ischemia”, a blockage, or what would likely result in an event of a stroke. Again, not going too deep into the weeds with this. Just know this, this inversion, shows that there is a potential effect on the blood flow through the heart. And this is where Hamlin’s tackle comes in to consideration.

It has been explained by various medical experts on various news programs, that a potential hit to the chest area, during this “T wave” part of the heart rhythm, could impact the flow of blood through the heart, and yes, causing cardiac arrest. While it has not been specifically stated by the Hamlin’s doctors, the speculation is that this “perfect storm,” the tackle and the stage of the heart beat, is what happened. There will likely be more discussed on this, days from now.

Nonetheless, the horror of watching any athlete collapse to the ground, is something we as fans just do not get over. But this time is something different. I recall watching the game where Washington Redskins quarterback broke his thigh bone during a game. I was watching both Jets and Lions games, when Dennis Byrd and Mike Utley were both paralyzed following collisions with their helmets (separate games). Even recently, with all the concussion injuries, these titans still manage to convey to us, usually with a “thumbs up” as they are carted off the field, this situation was different. Whether at the game or watching it on TV, this was different. Hamlin was unable to communicate with us. Everywhere you looked, fellow players, on both teams, were in tears. These seemingly tough guys, though trained to play through all kinds of pain and conditions, were suddenly witness to something, no one could have prepared for.

Of course, the conversation has begun on safety and just how common a situation this might actually be, even if occurring for the first time with the NFL. One news network actually stated a more common occurrence among teenagers aged 14 to 15, involving either a baseball or hockey puck to the chest. Stop and think about that, we hardly, if ever, hear about that. This situation can also occur during an auto accident. This cardiac phenomenon is called “commotio cortis”, caused by a sudden impact to the chest leading to cardiac arrest.

There are plenty of movies that innocently, and often times comedically show a recipient of a chest punch, gasping for air, with the assailant explaining “you will be alright in a few minutes.” One has to wonder with all of the boxing and MMA fights, we have not seen or heard of this before. I know with my own situation, a wired breast bone from my open heart surgery, I have always been sensitive to any impact to my chest for instance, wearing a seatbelt, knowing that in an accident, my breast bone could snap and damage my heart. And do not get me started on the act of CPR on me, if necessary, as it was explained to me how common it is, for ribs to get broken while CPR is being performed.

But this was such an unusual occurrence, and tragic. Hopefully Hamlin will recover fully, only time will tell. And unlike in 1999, when professional wrestler Owen Hart fell to his death from a rapelling accident during his entrance to the ring, and the WWE continued its Pay Per View after Hart had been taken out, the NFL did the right thing, and postponed the game.

We do not know if Hamlin had any other cardiac issues. Like me at 42 years old, why would anyone suspect a 24 year old to have any heart issues? Why would any of us suspect to have anything wrong with us? But the truth is, it can happen, and depending on the circumstance, that is when we find out there is a problem. And for some it can be too late.

My thoughts are with Damar Hamlin, his family, and his teammates and wishing for a full recovery.

Posted in Cancer, Education, Family and Friends, Inspired By..., Recreation, Side Effects, The Heart and tagged , , | Leave a comment

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