Cancer – Do You Feel Lucky? Well, Do Ya?
I am going to ask you three questions. Do not look ahead to the next question before answering each one. To help, I am going to skip a few lines in between each question.
If you had to choose between an apple and an orange, which would it be?
If money and time were no object, where is one place you would like to travel?
If you had to choose a cancer to be stricken with, what would it be?
Cue the sound of a needle scratching a record to a complete halt. Cancer? What?
Ok, first, my answer is an apple. I love putting peanut butter on apples. And my dream place to visit, Alaska. Those two questions were easy to answer. But that third question, what the Hell? Of course, we never think about opting for a certain type of cancer. We hope beyond all hopes never to even hear the word cancer, though it is happening more and more each day.
But the truth is, that third question really happens, well, not in the form of a question, rather, for most Hodgkin’s Lymphoma patients and survivors, we have heard this comment, “if you are going to get a cancer, Hodgkin’s is the one to get.” So, that is why I asked you in the form of a question. Imagine being told by a doctor, you are lucky to have gotten a particular cancer.
To be clear, no, lucky is the last thing I felt when I heard him say that to me. I was literally like “what the fuck is wrong with you!!! I don’t want any cancer!” If you refer to the image, you will see that Hodgkin’s ranks 6th of the top 26 cancers in terms of 5-year survival rates. Up until recently, I had never researched if Hodgkin’s was the best cancer to have. All I was aware of was the high remission rate, and I thought it meant I had a good chance at long term survival. Turns out that part was true, as I write this, I have had 37 years as a Hodgkin’s survivor.
While many of my fellow long term survivors echo my sentiment, others were not as strong, some even agreeing with their doctor. Here are some of the comments that have been shared:
“Having all these late side effects, I am not too sure about that.”
“I was told I had a good cancer (Hodgkin’s).”
“No cancer is good.”
“I am encouraged by the statistics. When I was young, breast cancer was considered mostly fatal.”
“What about all the late side effects caused by the treatments?”
“Hodgkin’s is the least of my worries at this point. All the side effects (cardiac) have flipped my world upside down.”
“No one wants cancer!”
“What really sucks… 3 of the 5 cancers above Hodgkin’s are linked to the the treatment for Hodgkin’s.” (and on a side note – along with the 3 referred to, I am also at risk of 4 other cancers in the top 26 from my treatments, along with my other issues)
“I felt lucky. I felt lucky that they knew what was wrong with me and they knew how to treat it.”
“I wanted to throw a punch!”
“I always put more emphasis on the “if” in the phrase.”
“No one from the top six says they are lucky.”
“I actually found the comment positive and hopeful.”
“No cancer is lucky and just look at the late side effects so many of us have to deal with from our treatments. It’s very scary living under the Sword Of Damacles.”
“It strengthened my inner belief that I would beat Hodgkin’s.”
While there were some who did not react as negatively as the majority of us took it, there is a range of reactions. I know personally, I wish the doctors would just stop saying it. And here is why. If you look at the graphic again, do you see any of those cancers stating 100% survivorship after five years? No. And the truth is, of the top six alone, there are too many that do not even hit remission, relapse, and worse, don’t survive.
Do not misunderstand me, after 37 years as a survivor, and in spite of all of my health issues from late side effects caused by my treatments for Hodgkin’s, I am still here experiencing my daughters lives as they continue to grow and experience life, I know that I am blessed. And I would not be here today, if it were not for the countless other survivors who have come into my life, young and old, newbies or long termers.
But that does not change, that the hardest thing to hear is “you have cancer,” and then follow that up with “you’re lucky.” Being told you have cancer does not feel lucky. It makes you angry. It makes you upset. And every word spoken after that, if it is not put in the right terms, can be hurtful.
I am glad that so many more cancers have higher favorable outcomes these days. That is one thing I have lived long enough to see. But I am also disappointed, that we have not gotten over the hump to find a 100% cure at this point.
This was a pin that I have from over fifty years ago, for a fundraiser for the American Cancer Society, to raise money for cancer research. Yes, I am disappointed that we still do not have that cure. And there really is no reason for that.
Paul's Heart 