https://pedelmanjr.com/my-dad-was-just-like-me/
The above link is for the written and published version on “Paul’s Heart” and in Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center’s annual “Visible Ink” Anthology, and the link below is for the actual live performance of my story.
As many of my readers know, I live for music, always have. So as we celebrate Father’s Day, or remember our Fathers this weekend, here are a list of songs to make your Father’s Day soundtrack special:
Eric Clapton “My Father’s Eyes”
Rick Springfield “My Father’s Chair”
Bruce Springsteen “My Father’s House”
Queen “Father To Son”
Madonna “Oh Father”
John Mayer “Daughters”
Luther Vandross “Dance With My Father”
Keith Urban “Song For Dad”
Reba McEntire “The Greatest Man I Ever Knew”
Stevie Wonder “Isn’t She Lovely”
Bob Carlisle “Butterfly Kisses”
Kenny Loggins “Turn Around”
And of course, probably the most famous song about Dads…
Harry Chapin “Cats In The Cradle”
Once again, it is Father’s Day weekend. Like many, Father’s Day can be filled with mixed emotions, bittersweet memories, happiness, and sorrow. The circumstances surrounding our relationships with our fathers, or as fathers with our children, affect how we recognize this weekend.
While this is the second year in a row that I will not physically be with my daughters, that does not mean that we will not be in each others hearts and thoughts. Quite the contrary. We speak and see each other via Facetime nearly every day as we live quite a distance from each other. And although I pretty much accept that for the time being, I do not expect to see even a card from them, I have found a way to celebrate Father’s Day with them, even from afar.
Just as I did last year, I sent my daughters a “Father’s Day” package. In it, was a recent photo that we had taken with each other, as well as a pendant set, that I wear half on my chain, along with another charm, a Chinese symbol for “Father/Daughter.” I have asked my daughters to wear their half, a heart that proclaims “Daddy’s Girl” on Sunday. But different from last year, I have decided that when we see each other in just a few weeks, we will not only celebrate Father’s Day when they visit with me, but we will celebrate other dates that we were separate for since we last saw each other.
Then there are those of us, who are dealing with the permanent loss of our fathers. For some, it has been decades, and for others like me, the loss is recent. I have several friends who after many years, continue to remember their Dads and speak of the hurt from the loss so many years later. I have many friends who have recently lost their fathers, and this will be their first Father’s Day without their first role model for what they would respect about a man. My sadness, still as fresh as his passing two years ago, constantly reminds me of the strength that he gave me through his genes.
I will celebrate Father’s Day this weekend, in memory of my Dad. I will speak to/”see” my daughters. And then I will celebrate Father’s Day again with them in person in just a few weeks.
To everyone reading, I wish you all a Happy Father’s Day, whether you are celebrating your father, or whether you are being celebrated. And for those mourning or remembering, I wish you comfort, and hope that you can fill your hearts with all the wonderful memories that you have of your fathers.
Paul's Heart 