In Between Milestones – 35 Years, Still A Big Deal
When celebrating anniversaries, we make a big deal out of major anniversaries, such as 1st, 5th, 25th, and of course, 50th. In the world of cancer survivorship, many of my fellow survivors and I do the same thing with our anniversaries, though several of us recognize our anniversaries differently. Some will recognize the day that they are told they are in remission, and others, including myself, celebrate the day that I was done with my treatments. The photo above, was taken one year after I was done with my treatment, which means the photo was taken thirty-four years ago. That is right, today I am 35 years in remission!
I think I might actually even look younger today than I did back then.
In November of 1988, I was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma, back then it was called Hodgkin’s Disease. My cancer was staged at 3B, almost as bad as one can have it. I underwent some of the most toxic treatments of chemotherapy and radiation therapy to be able to hear the words “you are in remission.” And though I would get to hear “remission” half-way through my treatments, my doctor wanted me to finish the course, the entire plan of treatments, taking my last dose of medicine on March 3, 1990. That was 35 years ago!
Up to, and including the time I was diagnosed, all I ever knew about cancer, was that people died from it. There was no internet for me in 1988, so all I had to hear about cancer, came from the television news or newspapers, that people died of cancer. You never heard of people surviving cancer. And it was not good enough as a patient to hear about something called a “5-year survival rate,” in spite of this survival rate for Hodgkin’s being well into the mid-80 percentage, at the age of 23 years old, I wanted to live much longer than five years. I believed that I could, especially if the cancer was gone, but I had never heard of anyone surviving long term. At the time, my grandmother was in remission for breast cancer two years, my only reference to anyone surviving cancer. Again, no access to the internet, I had no idea of the inspiration that was out there, people living after cancer, 30, 40, 50 years and more.
But that time would come soon enough, buying my first computer, getting an AOL account, and finding a “listserve” of other Hodgkin’s survivors, some still in treatment, some finished with treatment, and here they were, some who had survived decades. I saw that long term survivorship from cancer could be mine.
There were other things that I learned as time went on, something that even science and medicine were not aware of or prepared for, if we were going to live longer than those five years, that meant that there would be a possibility that we could develop late side effects from the treatments, though what side effects were not known. This was not studied. But this community of survivors I discovered, were sharing this knowledge among each other, and where help with these effects, and doctors who have knowledge of late side effects, could be found. This would come in handy myself, because over 17 years after I finished treatments, the first late effect from my treatments was discovered, in the form of a “widow maker” blockage with my heart, caused by the high dose of radiation that I received. This would be the beginning of many issues that would be discovered over the next 18 years for me. But I want to stress two things, first, not everyone who goes through treatments develops these side effects, and second, as bad as some of these issues got, the proper intervention has given me so many more years, and I have been blessed with so many opportunities and memories.
The fascinating thing is, over 35 years, I have been witness to progress, actually getting to see it, how Hodgkin’s get diagnosed, no more destructive and invasive staging procedures. The toxic and extreme treatments that I and many others were exposed to back in the 1960’s, the 1970’s, 1980’s, and 1990’s, with medicine’s knowledge, those very treatments had a good possibility of killing us, are no longer being used. I can tell you that treatments today are just as effective, and though still not pleasant, are more tolerable and safer. I have gotten to witness this progress.
The best part of my 35 years of survivorship, has been having the opportunity of being Dad to the best daughters a Dad could ever hope for. They were not around for my battle with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma, but from the first appearance of a late side effect, they have been my motivation and inspiration to not give up. There has been so much that I have gotten to experience with my daughters, now both in college, I really did not ever think I would see this day, yet here I am.
I cannot recognize today however, without recognizing others in my Hodgkin’s family over these thirty-five years. First, all of my new Hodgkin’s friends currently going through treatment yet. I hope that whether you hear of me through “Paul’s Heart”, or have read my book, “Paul’s Heart – Life As A Dad And A 35-Year Cancer Survivor,” follow me on TikTok, YouTube, Facebook, or Instagram, I hope you being able to follow someone who has been a survivor for four decades to be inspiring to you, that you too will have a long and fruitful life ahead of you.
Then there are all of the survivors that have come into my life over all of these years. I have known many of you nearly my entire survivorship. And even more inspiring to me, is that so many of you have survived even longer than I have, forty and fifty years or more! I do not take any day that I have for granted, but seeing how far you have come, gives me hope that I can see that longevity also.
If there is one thing that remains so cruel, sadly, there are some that are not here with me to recognize this day. Some, their bodies just no longer able to take the trauma of decades of late side effects, and even one, barely getting to enjoy a few months out of treatments. I miss you all to this day. I remember you all and the joy you shared with me while we were able to survive together. I wish there was a rhyme or reason, why we do not have a 100% cure rate when we are so close right now! Though progress has been made in safer and more effective treatments, it is not good enough.
The counter on this page now is set for March 3, 2030, which will mark 40 years as a cancer survivor. That is a milestone I want to reach, and likely, with my daughters, hopefully not the only other milestones I get to witness.
Paul's Heart 