Brakes On A Rite Of Passage
It is a rite of passage. It is also one of a parent’s biggest fears. A teenager in the family reaches the age, to be eligible to apply for their learner’s permit, and eventually earn their driver’s license. I earned my license by the time I turned 16 years of age. So, it should have only been natural to expect my daughters to have theirs around that same age. But that is not the way the plan worked out. In fact, unfortunately for them, they are not likely to see a license until their early twenties. On one hand, yes, it sucks. On another hand, it is safer for them. On yet another hand, it makes great money sense. But just as apparently having three hands does not make sense, when you consider the safety and the money concerns, it actually makes common sense.
First there is the motive for getting a driver’s license… freedom. A teenager will finally have the freedom to go pretty much where ever and when ever they choose. The downside? Parents expecting quid pro quo. “You want the car, you need to run here and do this for me.” The teenager soon learns they have been played into a role of errand runner. I personally did not bite on that as a teen driver. I chose to walk to school (4 miles, yes up hills and down hills, in the winter in 2 feet of snow…literally) for two reasons. One, parking was a nightmare living in the city. But the other reason, I needed to drive my kid sister with me. This could not have been any more inconvenient as it interfered with any after school plans.
But before long, I found out driving was also expensive. Gas was pricing out around $1.25 per gallon. There was also car insurance to pay, and being a male teen driver meant I would pay a lot more due to “risk” factors. And then, car maintenance was added to my expenses. This of course meant I needed a job, something that would give me at least enough to cover the car expenses, which sucked because then I would need to work more, if I wanted to do anything with the car. But working more, meant I would not be available to do the things I was trying to do with the car. A vicious cycle.
For forty-two years, I have been a very good driver, safe. I have not been responsible for one traffic accident. I have been in two accidents, neither my fault, and both leaving an impression on me, how bad things could have been. I have had many friends in car accidents, and my first ex wife was nearly killed in a head-on car collision. So there was a lot to think about as my daughters approached their fifteenth birthdays.
There was one more complication for my daughters, no fault of their own. Their mother and I divorced by the time they were eligible to drive, adding two new drivers was going to be a huge financial burden on both of us, really neither of us could afford. Sure, there were fears about accidents which all parents go through, but for me it was simple, can we afford it?
When faced with a problem, I try to be rational, no emotions. I want to think of all the factors necessary to make the right decision, not necessarily fair.
Having established that parentally, financially it was not possible, that meant that my daughters would have to foot the finances of operating a car. That meant them getting a job, as mentioned above. But here is the thing. As a parent, as opposed to when I was an unguided teenager, I felt school was more important, which meant having time for homework and studying, than working at a job. Sure, there were social and skill building opportunities with a job, but any work would only be allowed on the weekends, not on school nights. Hard to operate a car, working only a couple days a week. And at that point, you are working only for car opportunities, and nothing else.
Looking at the expenses of the car, of course, buying a car, most likely a used one, meant there would likely be frequent trips to the garage for repair, along with a car payment, gas, and of course insurance. Financially this was just not possible. That aside, how much sense did it really make after all? To drive a car for two years, then head off to college, where they would not be able to drive as many colleges do not allow driving in the first year, and depending where attending colleges, driving is discouraged for many reasons, especially parking convenience.
While I cannot guess the expense of a used car payment, or how much gas would be consumed, let’s just look at paying car insurance for say, just the period of time between graduation, and the first two years of college. It is probably a good guess that the average cost would total around $2500 a year, just to be able to drive the few weeks during breaks. Now I do not know about you, but I know a lot more important things I could do with $2500 than just have that temporary convenience.
With ridesharing, comes an option that gave my daughters two types of opportunities. The first, if either of their parents were not available to drive, they could simply call for an Uber. Of course, being in a big city college, they will learn to take public transportation. Both of these are cheaper options than car ownership and licensing. But being young consumers, this also gives my daughters an opportunity to learn financial responsibility and living within their means, while they build up credit as young adults. Having a car in the big city, they would quickly learn about parking fees, and likely driving citations, added to the other financial things that come with a license and car ownership.
Yes, I am a parental buzzkill, seemingly having deprived my daughters the opportunity to drive. While safety is always a concern, even well into their adulthood, for me, it was much more important for them to learn financial responsibility and that what seems like an inconvenience, actually bought time for something better.
Paul's Heart 